10. You know how time flies, only yesterday was the time of our lives

apologies for the long title, i couldn't come up with anything more fitting, that quote just seemed so appropriate.


Being back at school surrounded by nearly everyone i love - obviously missing a few - can sometimes fill your pillow with feathers. It's lovely to feel so content with where you are, friendship wise. Like the satisfaction of fitting that last piece of the puzzle and thinking, the picture is perfect and no one can take it apart, its exactly like the cover of the box and thats how it should be. But take your eyes off it for 1 minute and it only takes one piece of the jigsaw to get lost and ruin everything, sending all those feelings to the pit of your stomach. 
That's how i felt this evening, i received some upsetting information, and the centre piece of my puzzle was missing, and the feelings in my stomach made me want to be sick. I felt a brick in my throat, i wasn't sure if i wanted to vomit or cry. When you've spent so long on a puzzle and every ounce of your energy has been used to create that wonderful image on the packaging, to have it fall part so abruptly is shattering. I feel like a child, holding all the little pieces of my jigsaw puzzle in my hands, and only one piece is missing, the thought of not being able to complete it, make me feel as though, what's the point. But this isn't a puzzle, this is life. I wish it was as simple as finding the missing piece, but it's not. However, it is as simple as destroying a friendship as it is losing a piece of a puzzle. 


'You know how time flies, only yesterday was the time of our lives' - it's true. Only today was a frolicking around singing and joking with school friends making a great time of a dull day, and it took seconds to kill that. 
Months to build a house minutes to bring it to the ground.


Earlier on, i blogged about friendship and how you have to make sacrifices to be a good friend, make sure its worth all the energy, heart ache and dedication before you even consider being a, 'good friend'.


Nothing compares, no worries or cares, regrets and mistakes, they're memories made, who would have known how bittersweet this would taste? 
- Adele


Eff x